holaolah

Dwight Yoakam Visits Lancaster

If you look really hard you can see Dwight. Awesome show. I owe my Auntie and my Uncle for the tickets.

My Past Is Catching Up With Me

Something I've failed to tell you before this point in our relationship: I was a warchild.
Dear readers, please welcome the newest blog on the block, Bridgeton Legends.  It just so happens that it's about everything that's happened on my block of origin. It's weird, the site is authored by Kyle, the guy who puts more work into holaolah than I do, and he's recruiting the old gang to immortalize the tales of the old neighborhood and town.

I'm excited and scared. Excited because there's a lot of gold in these stories. We had a very rich upbringing and there are laughs a plenty to be had by the readers/hearers of these legends. I guess the scared part comes with the fact that these stories are finally being put down. We'll no longer have the oral tradition to tell around the fires when we take our firstborn out into the woods to teach them the old ways of digging trenches for the impending Russian invasion, how to use a Wiffleball bat as a rock launcher, building match-head bombs, and the lengths that some of us will go to to complete our G.I. Joe collections.

The Lakestreetians will now be chronicled, and the embellishments might cease. We'll have to come to a communally agreed upon version of the truth. There is a danger in documentation, we might lose the flourish of a new voice in the retelling of our old tales. If I do commit the story of the "Fire on the Wire," will I truly be able to capture my father's pride in the event? Can I write it in such a way that will convey his tears of joy in making Mrs. Morvay lose her steaks?  Another reason I am kinda dreading this venture goes something like this -- the legends that I am involved with usually end up with me being embarrassed or preyed upon in some way. The legend titled "Rusty's Cage" will basically end with me being captured by the older guys on the block and thrown into the pen of Kyle's horn-dog Golden Retriever, Rusty. To make a long story short, Rusty was a sexual predator, and the kids on my block stood outside his cage laughing as Rusty, well, used me as his bitch. Fun times. This is the reason that I prefer cats.

But really, all of the above can be chalked up to fear. At least we'll be doing something deliberate to try and get this stuff down. That's worth a lot. I think we can tackle all those previously mentioned concerns as they come up. For now, we're starting something, and that speaks volumes about the people of my hometown. There's no more saving this stuff for a rainy day -- waiting til someone pays us to write them or until one of us finds some sweet writing gig somewhere which probably won't happen. I do still think that Mr. Ira Glass and his "This American Life" radio-show should take notice of this cache of great storytelling.

It's like the old neighborhood gang is calling me out to play "Hide & Go Seek Army," or calling me out to fight for some reason I don't understand. There's no point in staying inside anymore, there's nothing on TV.  The real life is outside, on the street. I guess I'll go out and play. And if they try and throw me into a dog pen again, make no mistake, I will fight any beast that attempts to have his way with me. Let's write.

Megan Mooney Video

It took Fred Phelps and his loony antics to remind me that I can be very patriotic

These bikers make me proud to be an American. Seriously.

"When a total stranger gets on a motorcycle in the middle of winter and drives 300 miles to hold a flag, that makes a powerful statement."

Cue the Lee Greenwood. Just Kidding.

Here's the story in question: Bikers Roll to Soldier Funerals To Drown Out Protesters - February 16, 2006 - The New York Sun - NY Newspaper.

If you'd like to do more research on Fred Phelps and scratch your head and wonder if Hell will have a special battalion of demons and evil creatures just for his damnation case, check out this wikipedia article on him. What a wack-job.

I was unable to view Fred's site from work because it was blocked due to websense's determination that it contains hate speech. Really? Are you sure? I just got a look at it. More whacked stuff. Here's a little recap of one of their recent missions to protest at a dead soldiers funeral:

We made our way to the site of the memorial service (absent a body) for Army Sgt. First Class John D. Morton, he lately of Stanton, Kentucky and more recently (and currently) of Hell. We had a nice location to display the precious seed – just as the road curved to reach the memorial service site (at the First Church Of Baal) – so display it we did. As the family and “friends” of Morton came around the curve, slowing to take in the sight and then to turn into the service, they had full view of these messages, held aloft by the banner carriers:

God Hates America
God Hates Fag Enablers
God Hates Fags
God Hates the USA
God Hates You!
United You’ll Fall
Too Late To Pray
God Blew Up The Troops
Fags Doom Nations
Don’t Worship The Dead
God Is America’s Terrorist
Fags Are Worthy Of Death
God’s Rod (photo of airplane striking Twin Towers)
You’re Going To Hell
Thank God For Dead Soldiers
God Is Your Enemy
America Is Doomed
God’s View (picture of uncle Sam in cross-hairs of God)
Numerous American flags on the ground and held upside down

On a final note, in case you're looking for a righteous crusade against Fred and his family, the following fuckfredphelps domains are available for you to use. Godspeed!

For The Record

In the spirit of full disclosure, I must tell you that I have purchased (and therefore own and occasionally listen to) two iTunes by Toby Keith. The songs in question: "Beer For My Horses" and "I Love This Bar."
I know that many of you come here for my incredible insight into things musical, which I never seem to talk about, and you're probably thinking that dudes like me are too cool for Toby. I would say you're right, but sometimes our tastes can't help but create some dissonance. I have no real excuse for myself other than I find the songs very catchy, funny, and sometimes inspiring. Sometimes we can't help liking what we like.

The Sheik of Shamone

This picture of Michael and Prince Michael or is it Blanket (I can't really tell) makes me miss my friend David George. For some reason he thinks that I always know where in the world you can find MJ at any given moment. Duh dude, he's been in Bahrain for, like, ever!

Recent Tears

If you're a man like me you can count your most recent experiences with tears on one hand. You can judge that based on whatever you wanna judge me on. I'm thinking now back to September when I borrowed Wattstaxx from the Newark library. The film contained a clip of the good doctor MLK giving his (I'm pretty certain of this) "I've been to the Mountaintop Speech."

I sat down to watch the classic soul and funk and afrotastic goodness, the volume was up high, joined by a big bowl of popcorn and a cold beer.  Between clips of Richard Pryor and brothers trying to work it out explaining the struggle, the man, women, there was Martin, saying...

"Well, I don't know what will happen now. We've got some difficult days ahead. But it doesn't matter with me now. Because I've been to the mountaintop. And I don't mind. Like anybody, I would like to live a long life. Longevity has its place. But I'm not concerned about that now. I just want to do God's will. And He's allowed me to go up to the mountain. And I've looked over. And I've seen the promised land. I may not get there with you. But I want you to know tonight, that we, as a people will get to the promised land. And I'm happy, tonight. I'm not worried about anything. I'm not fearing any man. Mine eyes have seen the glory of the coming of the Lord."

And then I just started crying. For hopes and battles lost, for being so close and then getting cut down. For kids left without a dad, for a movement punched in the gut and shattered. For getting a sermon and being touched by God when I least expected it. I owe a lot to the good doctor. I credit hearing about him in grade school for helping me sort out fact from fiction and learning how to love people. Thanks again.

Here's  a link to his "I have a Dream" speech if you're interested in listening: Download i_have_a_dream.mp3 (right click, save as...).

Crappy New Year!

I know some people who are spending the month on the Lemon Diet. This also means that I know some people who will be spending the month shitting their brains out.

Mmm, pass me some more of that lemon-syrup-cayenne-water, it's dinner time!

Old School Food

Don't you love it when you find something in the supermarket that looks like it's packaging hasn't been updated in quite some time? Here's what I found this evening at Super G.